Fields of Gold: Journey to the Center of Plastic

There comes a time in every child's life when they get the stupidest idea in their head and it melds its way into their brain. And no matter how dull this idea is, it starts to make sense and eventually it becomes as true as night and day. What is a child (a Fortune child, no less) to do when a stupid idea almost promises to yield fantastic results? Dig a fucking hole in your grandparent's backyard, that's what!

The details to me are quite fuzzy on how this idea came to be, but my brother came to me one weekend day whilst I was playing the Nintendo, or perhaps it was some form of dangerous gadgetry... Who cares? He told me of something that shocked and bewildered me. Apparently some kid from school told him that under the dirt crust of the earth, some 100 feet down, was a layer of molten plastic! HOLY FUCKING SHITWAFERS! PLASTIC?!

I held onto his every word as he detailed a plan on how we were to acquire said plastic, and use it to make our own toys. I felt like a kid in a candy shop, only the candy was molten plastic. We set off on our journey, wielding shovels and work gloves and found a good spot to dig, from there the rest was cake. And by cake, I mean impossible to do. We got about 1 foot into the ground when we hit the solid clay layer and gave up. (ADD, anyone?) It was not until 2 days later when our Grandma discovered the hole and then made us fill it (Why is it that when you dig a hole and try to fill it, there isnt enough dirt left to fill the hole completely?). To this day, I still wonder if the center of the earth is made up of a man made material at 100 feet below ground level.

I guess no one will ever find out.